All the heterosexual nonsense I was forced to endure during episode EIGHT of The Bachelorette

tonight we watched a grown man show a beautiful woman a toy plane, and crash land as a response

I don’t know about you, but last week’s episode was VERY interesting. Sure, I had trouble recognising who all the contestants were, and I was very confused by the group game they were playing, and it did go for a long time, but they really are a very athletic bunch who can really kick around a ball.

Apart from missing an episode because of soccer (heterosexual nonsense unless it is ladies soccer or that one gay lad who hates terfs, we love him), we also had a bunch of GOSSIP - Bec and Carissa were first rumoured to be dating, however since the furore, Bec has clarified that they AREN’T dating, Carissa is just off “to work on the yachts”, which I imagine is some kind of 1940s slang for lesbians.

becapressing

A post shared by beca pressing 🌈 (@becapressing)

I personally think they’re together, they just are contractually required to say they’re not.

The other rumour is that KONRAD, our beloved bisexual beauty (I KNOW IM PROJECTING) is apparently being eyeballed to be the next Bachelor. God I hope so… it DEFINITELY means we’ll be in big business next year if that’s the case. (also we need to start talking about what else you want us to recap next year - love island???)

ANYWAY. Let’s get recapping.