All the heterosexual nonsense I was forced to endure during episode SEVEN of The Bachelorette

What would the inventor of parades, Martin (Marty) Grath think?

Howdy! Mmmm the seventh episode, that good old episode that is not the sixth, but not yet the eight. Not a girl, not yet a woman.

I must tell you that I have had some preeeettttttttyyyyyy crazy insomnia this week, and my brain is full of cold soup! Not the fancy cold soup that you’re meant to eat cold, just soup that has been left on the bench for too long. That’s my brain.

I’m so hesitant about the mardi gras theme this episode, I’m so hesitant. Is this going to be a real “journey through the straight gaze”, where we find out exactly what our community can be reduced to? Or will this be weirdly affirming? Or both? Perhaps, like me, the message of this episode is versatile. I truly hope for the best.

the lesson i have learned is “never hope”

Speaking of weirdly affirming, it was recently Rebecca Shaw’s birthday. Sweet sixteen, NEVER been kissed (on the mouth). Rebecca Shaw is always my favourite thing about the event known as Mardi Gras, because she finds somewhere to sit and then after I have finished having a little dance, I grab a drink and go sit with her and she gives me many compliments. I dine off those compliments for years.

ANYWAY. Let’s a recap.

MOST ANNOYING

Mardi Gras

Let’s get all this out of the way. We need to STOP trying to make Sydney Cricket Ground a thing, and we need to cancel the Mardi Gras, im sorry. I am not fair, but i am harsh.

So, the group date was a Mardi Gras themed date. I happen to know that the mardi gras organisation is doing a lot of work to try and make the ticketed parade at the SCG a “thing”, despite a lot of pushback from the community. This was clearly another attempt at that.